I attended a leadership conference where the CEO invited the VP’s in the room to ask any and all questions, so we could “sweep them into the dustbin.”
Larry asked a challenging question, which the CEO fielded. Later, Larry asked another probing question. When he asked his 3rd question, the CEO jokingly said we would now “sweep Larry into the dustbin.”
There were no more challenging questions from anyone.
Here’s a leadership paradox: in order to have a team that will buy into our vision, we need to actively elicit the points of disagreement.
Great leaders are open to the probing questions and challenges to their positions that ensure they get the best feedback to inform their decisions. That lets them see where the problems might lie and fix them before they become major issues. Plus, when your trusted allies are raising these challenging questions, you can be absolutely sure that many outside that circle will have the same concerns.
Sure, you don’t want people constantly being disruptive, or challenging you in ways that undermine your authority, but you want to make sure your response doesn’t discourage honest feedback.
If you are finding someone to be disruptive, you can coach that person privately on how to deliver the feedback in a more productive manner, such as:
“Tom, I really value the honest critique you always give me. Occasionally, though, I find it can sidetrack our group discussions. I’d like to work with you on how we can make sure I always get that honest feedback without that happening when we’re in a group setting. Would that be all right?”
Of course, if you truly have a staff member who just likes to be contrary or disruptive, and you’ve tried 1-on-1 coaching with no success, then perhaps it’s time to help that employee find a more suitable job.
Just remember that the most effective leaders don’t seek out constant agreement and approval, they value those outlier opinions that keep them on their toes!
And even if you aren’t in a leadership position, a great way to grow is to find out how you’re doing.
The ability to ask questions is a sign of safety and equality! When questions get shut down, power lurks in the corners! Thanks for sharing this story. It’s important that leaders lead from a place of wholeness, not need for control! 🙂
Yes, cutting off questions (or any type of feedback) is a sign that one isn’t open to suggestions.
It is always good for a good leader to listen to group members’ opinions and weigh all options instead of trying to dictate.
True, Agnes. As a leader, generally the buck stops with you in making the decision, but people will have a lot more respect for you and the decision if you show you are first hearing all of their opinions before making it.
Yeah, even joking about sweeping a team member into the garbage is a red flag. Not a great leader. Not a great moment.
I think he truly meant it as a joke, but it certainly didn’t come across that way. And no one would have dared to raise a challenging question after that.